MaC
Moderator
This year anyway.
What is your weirdest/most unusual Christmas Present.
I reckon I'm going to win this one
What is your weirdest/most unusual Christmas Present.
I reckon I'm going to win this one
Weirdest Christmas present ?
- Thread starter MaC
- Start date
MaC
Moderator
It's a family in-joke that some of us can make anything grow. I have an issue with triffidism of houseplants, etc., and I manage to grow stuff that's not always expected to thrive here, but I don't claim to have green thumbs.
Anyway, cousin sent me a bird feeder full of llama wool for Springtime.....and I jest you not, a bag of llama shit fertiliser
I laughed until I saw the price !
ElThomsono
VIP Member
DOOM mask: living off borrowed time the clock tick faster.
BorderReiver
Moderator
From my eldest. Not weird but different.
ElThomsono
VIP Member
A couple of presents turned up today, "From Grandad" which struck me as odd, as soon as I got my hands on it I knew what it was, even before it was unwrapped. My Dad made three of these when we were kids, it's a rubber strip with a sawn wooden fish either side, so it wobbles when you shake it. Almost immediately Sully got his skin caught in it and it nipped him, which dragged me back three decades to when it first happened to me.
MaC
Moderator
I ha
I have snakes made like that, and they too nip !
A couple of presents turned up today, "From Grandad" which struck me as odd, as soon as I got my hands on it I knew what it was, even before it was unwrapped. My Dad made three of these when we were kids, it's a rubber strip with a sawn wooden fish either side, so it wobbles when you shake it. Almost immediately Sully got his skin caught in it and it nipped him, which dragged me back three decades to when it first happened to me.
Templogin
VIP Member
I have chosen my own presents for years now, but once upon a time, many years since, from my then partner I received a yellow thong with a zip up the front. It gets worse. I was about to get into bed one night and she asked me to put it on to see how I looked in it. When I pulled them up the flat 1.5 inch-ish elastic went up my arse crack, which was the weirdest feeeling having something touch my ring. It was making me walk on my tip-toes. She invited me to stand at her side of the bed, then she yanked the zip down and my tackle fell out like a road accident. I was absolutely terrified that she was going to yank the bloody zip back up. I never wore the thing again.
MaC
Moderator
Not weird, but very, very surprizing.
A Pro-ject Pro turntable, Mission 778X amp and a pair of Dali Oberon speakers plus stands.
I had no idea it was coming, and the sound is staggering.
The weird was a little woolen mitten designed to ripen your avocados (maybe that is euphemism, I'll need to check)
A Pro-ject Pro turntable, Mission 778X amp and a pair of Dali Oberon speakers plus stands.
I had no idea it was coming, and the sound is staggering.
The weird was a little woolen mitten designed to ripen your avocados (maybe that is euphemism, I'll need to check)
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Templogin
VIP Member
MaC
Moderator
Beachlover
Moderator
I honestly couldn't count the number of guys I saw in casualty with foreskins caught in zips, so count yourself lucky.
I also recall seeing a recent article showing that "fractured" penises were also much more common at this time of the year. If I remember right it's about viagra and women riding their fellas while facing their men's feet.
The only ruptured penis I ever saw was in Hull Royal Infirmary and a trawler man returning to shore after a stint away and engaging with a working woman from the Anlaby Road red light district after a few beers and being so enthusiastic that he misjudged and hit the bed frame as she shuffled back onto the mattress.
For buttock clinching empathy, it was on a par with another naked guy brought in wearing only a towel provided by the ambulance crew as he'd been streaking but blood covered. It was only when we removed the towel we realised that no-one until then had noticed that he was without penis and testicles, as in his schizophrenic episode he'd lopped off his tackle.
I also recall seeing a recent article showing that "fractured" penises were also much more common at this time of the year. If I remember right it's about viagra and women riding their fellas while facing their men's feet.
The only ruptured penis I ever saw was in Hull Royal Infirmary and a trawler man returning to shore after a stint away and engaging with a working woman from the Anlaby Road red light district after a few beers and being so enthusiastic that he misjudged and hit the bed frame as she shuffled back onto the mattress.
For buttock clinching empathy, it was on a par with another naked guy brought in wearing only a towel provided by the ambulance crew as he'd been streaking but blood covered. It was only when we removed the towel we realised that no-one until then had noticed that he was without penis and testicles, as in his schizophrenic episode he'd lopped off his tackle.
Templogin
VIP Member
Which brings to mind two stories, not for the weak of stomach.
One guy jumped off the top of the bus shelter and slid down the concrete bus stop post
. Apparently it was not fixable,
After a night on certain special mushrooms (shrooms to the young people) the mushroom muncher stabbed himself in the eye with a screwdriver, blinding him in that eye. I saw him some weeks later and he was still laughing at the whole event.
One guy jumped off the top of the bus shelter and slid down the concrete bus stop post
de-gloving his penis
After a night on certain special mushrooms (shrooms to the young people) the mushroom muncher stabbed himself in the eye with a screwdriver, blinding him in that eye. I saw him some weeks later and he was still laughing at the whole event.
Like last year, and indeed the year before, there seems to be a widespread desire in the extended family to buy an Instant Pot for each other - which I have had to be nearly rude to people about in terms of declining the offer.
I think it is just a pressure cooker with a timer on the side. But, I wonder if there is more to it than that.
They also make this air purifyer which, for some reason, puts me off even more.
I am going back to listening to my new record player
I think it is just a pressure cooker with a timer on the side. But, I wonder if there is more to it than that.
They also make this air purifyer which, for some reason, puts me off even more.
I am going back to listening to my new record player
MaC
Moderator
I have a rice cooker....it's a bit of clutter in the hall press. It can stay there until someone wants it.
I do use my pressure cooker though, but mostly for canning these days....and Himself uses it to make tablet, 'cos it's a great pot for it
I do use my pressure cooker though, but mostly for canning these days....and Himself uses it to make tablet, 'cos it's a great pot for it
We have a pressure cooker that dad uses all the time. I'm absolutely not worried about a 95 year old using a bomb in the house. We were using it the other day and my 32 year old friend shit herself when it started to fizz and hiss (as they do). She had never seen one before.
G
G
ElThomsono
VIP Member
There's a reason there are no skeletons in the Titanic, just empty pairs of boots.
MaC
Moderator
See if you take that 'jelly', and while it's still runny (or just heat it up in the micro until it is again) stir through loads of shredded meat from the bones, season it, pour into ramkins and set it aside to set.
We call that potted hough here when it's made from the shin bones, or other cheugh bits, of cows. It's usually quite peppery.
It's a treat that you only really get from a real butcher's shop now, unless you make your own.
Brilliant on a sandwich, or toast, but Himself eats it with buttered oatcakes.
Saint-Just
Administrator
It's fab if you do the exact same thing with ox tail. Cooking it with carrots and not too much water will make a broth rich in the gelatine that comes from the disks on the vertebrae; you shred the meat with 2 forks, remove the bones and leave to set.
MaC
Moderator
We make mulligatawny soup from oxtail. It's thick with the gelatine, but it's spicy. Himself is fond of it.
I found a very old receipt for an oxtail broth seethed in a covered pot on the fire for four hours. They spiced that up with peppercorns and ginger. It seems to have a long provenance here even before the Empire found India.
I found a very old receipt for an oxtail broth seethed in a covered pot on the fire for four hours. They spiced that up with peppercorns and ginger. It seems to have a long provenance here even before the Empire found India.
MaC
Moderator
Well, you're a cyclist some times, aren't you ?